She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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