There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
he wants to bone in the snuggie
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
