i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Randomize
