Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
