youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
