I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize