Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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