stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
