these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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