super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
