I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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