So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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