my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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