Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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