my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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