they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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