i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize