i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
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