Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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