You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
