The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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