I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
