I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
