She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize