I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
