I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
