Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I need to align my fucking chakras
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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