I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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