how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Randomize