Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
