so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
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