you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I take back everything I said about communal showers
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
