i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
