sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
