guys are only as good as the porn they watch
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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