woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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