Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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