Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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