I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize