I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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