Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

The brown eye won't let me do that either.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere

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(559): View more from California

I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"

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(785): View more from Kansas

So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.

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(770): View more from Georgia

She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day

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(305): View more from Florida

It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.

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(813): View more from Florida

I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it

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(206): View more from Washington

yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey

(1-206): View more from Washington

Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.

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