he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
