So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Randomize
