ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
