We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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