you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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