So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
