I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Randomize
