worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
