Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
