There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize