woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
